


The Masks We Wear

by Illiteracy_is_for_woozles



Series: Reality 'Verse [3]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man - All Media Types, Spider-Man: Homecoming (2017), The Flash - All Media Types
Genre: Gen, Masks, Miraculous Ladybug References, Personas, Self-Acceptance, Self-Doubt, Self-Insert, Self-Preservation, Self-Reflection
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-21
Updated: 2019-01-21
Packaged: 2019-10-13 22:37:45
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,211
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17496695
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Illiteracy_is_for_woozles/pseuds/Illiteracy_is_for_woozles
Summary: Flash notices something that Peter had never realized, sparking a conversation.





	The Masks We Wear

**Author's Note:**

> This one is really personal to me.  
> It's a little rambly, so I hope it comes across in the way I intended, but thanks to @fightyspidey on tumblr aka 9VaniaStein9 on here and @ragingstillness on tumblr for beta-reading for me. You two were so helpful when I was trying to figure out if my thoughts made sense or if it was just word-vomit.

After everything, their relationship hadn’t changed that much.

Well, when they wore their masks and didn’t use their real names things stayed the same. (Mostly.) The big difference was that now they did team patrols mixed in with their solo patrols. Mr. Stark had been surprised, but he hadn’t disapproved. (Though, the Batman-Iron Man feud was well-documented, he wasn’t going to deny his mentee an ally)

But at school and during the day, when everyone knew who they were…

Peter didn’t want to pretend that things weren’t awkward, because they were. But it sure would’ve been easier if Ned and Michelle didn’t constantly pull him aside to ask if either he or Flash had been hit on the head recently. Peter hadn’t told either of them anything other than the bare bones: Flash was a friend now.

They weren’t so sure he’d really changed, but they tried to be nice. Or, Ned did. Michelle was her usual standoffish self, but that was part of who she was as a person. But they both still acted like Flash was going to turn around and bite them at any moment, so it made him uncomfortable and Peter knew that.

Which was why when they had been teamed up in psychology for a project, instead of using the library and its computers like anyone  _ not _ trying to struggle through life would, they were sitting across from each other on a roof in the warehouse district with their homework spread out around them and their phone data depleting rapidly.

Peter was engrossed in his textbook, chewing distractedly on a pencil with his mask pulled halfway up his face, when he happened to notice that Flash’s pen had been making the same circle on the page for the last… How long had it been? The black ink had gotten really dark, enough to sink through the page and probably stain the one underneath.

“You okay?”

The other boy shook himself, looking up with half-glazed eyes.

“Huh? Oh, yeah.”

Peter set his pencil down and clasped his hands together. When someone needed to talk, you listened.

Flash sighed.

“Come on, man. Not again.” He bent a little deeper over his papers.

Peter raised an eyebrow. The other boy, not even looking at his face, tossed down his pen and sat up.

“Why do we act different in the masks?”

The web-slinger cocked his head to the side. He didn’t act all that different, did he? Maybe a little mouthier, sure, but he was still  _ Peter _ underneath it all.

“I mean,” Flash scoffed. “Me, I get. You, though?”

Peter’s gaze fell to the books, not taking in anything more than a sea of black and white shapes.

“I actually hadn’t realized.”

Flash rolled his eyes.

“I didn’t mean it was a bad thing; I just meant that you’re different under the mask than you are without it, and I was wondering why that is?”

Peter thought back over what he’d been reading in his homework.

“In psychology they talk about masking being a way to protect yourself from negative or harmful emotions. It’s not necessarily healthy, nor is it viable long-term, but it  _ is  _ an answer.” He took a breath. “But I think our cases are closer to that of a different belief.”

Flash had settled back against some piece of the building and was listening, his thoughts carefully hidden behind a blank expression.

“Some say that everyone has three faces: One they show to everyone, a second they show to close friends and family, and a third they never show to anyone at all.”

Flash’s mask creased between his eyes.

“Like masks.”

“Exactly.” Peter leaned forward a little, getting excited. “But it’s a little different for us because two of our three masks are for the public.”

Flash motioned for him to continue.

“Have you ever seen  _ Miraculous Ladybug _ ?” The spiderling tried to keep the glee out of his voice. 

“That French anime-type show for pre-teen girls?”

Peter couldn’t see his eyebrows, but he knew that one of them was raised in judgement.

“Don’t knock it until you try it.” He continued: “In the beginning, Chat Noir and Ladybug are both  _ so very different  _ from who they are as civilians; Chat’s a total pun-master while his alter ego is a nerd who blushes at everything and Ladybug is the suave leader who almost always has everything together, when  _ her  _ alter ego is the clumsiest and most awkward girl in Paris.”

“Is there a point to this?”

“In Season Two you see something you hadn’t before: Those two sides that were almost like different people start coalescing; you realize that they weren’t two different people and neither of them were a mask. Because they were both always there, with or without the superpowers.”

“So how does this random, fanboy vomit-post answer my question?”

Peter smiled.

“That right there.”

Flash screwed his mouth up.

“We might act completely different when we’re at school or on patrol, but it’s still us.” Peter softened his smile. “The differences between the personas we, or anyone else give out, depend on who we’re around and where we are but they are always  _ us  _ in some way. And who we are in the mask may actually be the most raw version of ourselves, stripped down to the bare parts, because hardly anyone has any expectations from the us underneath.”

Flash still looked skeptical, so Peter tried a different tactic.

“You said I act differently at school than when I wear the mask. That’s not me betraying myself; that’s just self-preservation.” He gestured to his face. “When I wear this, I can crack jokes and everybody loves me for it because it’s funny. But if Peter Parker started doing it at school? How do you think people would react to that?”

Flash nodded his head slowly.

“So, in your case it’s necessary to hide that part of yourself.”

Peter shrugged.

“Again, I didn’t know I was doing it, so I guess it was subconscious.” He gestured to the other boy. “And I don’t know about your life, and I don’t expect you to tell me anything, but it kinda sounds like the same deal.”

“Why’s that?” And there was the defensiveness.

“I only mean that you, in the mask, seem like a cool guy. You’re nice and easy to get along with, but you’re also really kind and open with your emotions, and that can be a target.”

Flash’s jaw clenched.

“So you act all tough in school; you act like the stereotypical ‘cool guy’ and nothing more.” Peter held up a hand to stop the objections. “I’m not saying it’s a bad thing. There’s no shame in self-preservation.”

Flash looked off into the middle distance.

“And like you said, the person at school and the superhero aren’t two different people; they’re just two halves of me.” He focused on Peter. “I’m just protecting myself.”

“As long as you - or I, for that matter - don’t hurt ourselves or anyone in the process, I don’t see why we should feel bad for keeping certain parts of ourselves separate.”

Flash leaned his head back against the wall and stared up at the clouds. His words were a whisper, but weighted.

“And we define what the mask separates.”

**Author's Note:**

> As always, I love criticism.


End file.
